My near-death experience.

Welcome to an un-common edition of story time with Ana.

 

Disclaimer: This story isn’t for the faint heart, viewers discretion is advised. All the events in the story happened in real life, it is not a work of fiction.

 

It was a normal evening, my brother and I were watching an episode of The Big Bang Theory, Bernadette was in labour, screaming. I think that was nature’s way of foreshadowing the events that were about to follow in my real life.

My eyes wandered away from the laptop screen towards our dressing-table and it was at that exact moment I saw it, my brother sensing my sudden change in posture looked there as well. A monstrous blackish-brown creature was seen crawling into our room, sucking the happiness out of our world like a death eater. We paused the show in hurry, and went into defense mode, which was mostly me screaming at my brother to make it go away while he freaked. This was followed by my brother screaming back at me, that we’re in this together. It was settled then, I would capture the cockroach under a big piece of newspaper and my brother would crush it.

We thought our plan would work but boy were we wrong. The creature took refuge under the dressing-table, leaving us dumbfounded and in sheer panic at the failure of our very first plan. There was no time to waste, so with our quick thinking we made another plan, I would use my phone’s flashlight to lure the demon out while my brother crushes it with his slipper.

We put our plan into action and guess what? The son of a cockroach did come out from under the dressing-table but that bastard was smart, he merely showed us half its body making sure it was not completely out, so my brother couldn’t kill it. It was like it was mocking us right at the face, “Look at me humans, there is NOTHING you can do. I’m invincible!” (He probably evil laughed in cockroach dialect after that.)
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Then he moon-walked inside his refuge.

We kept up with our plan, with both of us freaking out and realizing how shit scary cockroaches really are. Then the cockroach finally came out of his refuge, started climbing from one of the sides of the dressing-table(my brother was on that side, and I was diagonal to it, on my bed) my brother said, “Oh, I’ve got him! I’ve got him! I have a plan!” and I believed him, big mistake. He went into his crushing position but then the UNTHINKABLE HAPPENED. While I was watching all this unfold right before my eyes I had forgotten that I had put myself in a very vulnerable place, unarmed right in front of enemy approach. My brother couldn’t do it, he couldn’t crush it, you’d think the cockroach climbed away and hid somewhere, won’t you?
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Oh you’re so so wrong.

While my brother couldn’t kill it, the cockroach had another plan. IT FLEW RIGHT TOWARDS ME!!

 

YES, IT WAS A GIGANTIC FLYING COCKROACH, WHICH FLEW, IN FULL “CHARGE!” MODE, RIGHT TOWARDS ME WHILE I WAS ON MY BED.
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I screamed bloody murder, like any sane individual would and ran out of the room jumping, screaming and slightly sweating through my eyes, “IT IS ON ME!? I FEE LIKE IT’S ON ME! OH MY GOD!”
tumblr_nw4vfyES431u9bgp9o1_250My brother was confused and couldn’t comprehend what had just happened, “The brown giant can fly!?” was all he could think of whereas my dad screamed from the other side of the house asking “What happened?” I ran towards the room my dad was in, sweat in my eyes and freaking out, asking him to come and kill it, little did I know my dad had company of his two friends.

Great, just great.
Steve-Carell-Facepalm

“Is it a cockroach?” they asked.

“Yes.” I croaked.

One of my dad’s friend tried to help us, my brother directed him towards the crime scene but the demon has hidden itself in OUR BED. He couldn’t do much and we shifted towards the other room terrified and freaked. We were both having fits of nervous laughter cause not only had we embarrassed ourselves in front of other people but also, we couldn’t kill it and it was still there somewhere out there, watching us or waiting for us. My brother was going into regret as to why he didn’t kill it the moment he had a chance, but in his defense we didn’t know it could freaking fly!

 

You’d think the story would end here, us terrified of going into the other room and spend our night in fear and later forgetting about it, won’t you?
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We were trying to build up the courage to fight back . “A cockroach cannot dominate us!” we chanted while we were in the other room, far far away from the actual crime scene and then it happened….again.
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I can still feel the chill run down my spine as I saw that bloody bastard enter THE ROOM WE HAD SHIFTED TO AND AGAIN, HIDE UNDER THE DRESSING TABLE!

I froze in my place whereas my brother left me alone in the room with my previous attacker! I felt betrayed, alone and feared of another flight attack, I looked at the bloody thing and saw it looking back AT ME.

I was screaming at my brother to come back in, but he kept shushing me, appearing twice from behind the curtains. I ran with all my might outside and then everything slowed down. My brother was in call of duty mode, with his slipper in his hands and waiting for the smooth criminal to make his move and it did.

It was running towards the bed, trying to find refuge under a bigger piece of furniture, my brother only had ONE SHOT. It was a make it or break it moment, he locked eyes on the target, which was furiously running towards it’s checkpoint and then he threw his weapon with a thud!

A silence fell into the room for a second which was later covered with a scream of victory from my brother. “Yes! Hell yeah!” He shouted.
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I fist bumped him with full force. The slipper had hit the cockroach precisely, and the demon fell under the chair, very much dead, lying upside down.

Then, as if to put this scary half hour of our life behind us, came our dad picking up the deceased and throwing it away.

We were among those people, who mocked other people when they got scared of these creatures, hell, yesterday I was making fun of my friend for freaking out the way I did today, but we have learned a valuable lesson. Never judge a book by it’s cover, they make look small but they have the power to dominate, body and soul, with full force.

 

It was a cockroach cruse, you make fun of people being scared of them, they come and evoke a fear in you, you never knew existed.

You have been warned. Beware.


Have you got some scary encounter you’ve had with any insects or animals or anything really? Do share them with me in the comments below.

My heart almost fell out of my chest today but at least it gave me something interesting to write about haha… #thingswegothroughforinspiration

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